Christian enthusiasm and a society of respect and manners

14 April 2011. Some in my family are evangelical, others are more conventional Christians. I respect their right to be so. I consider my own spiritual and religious beliefs to be a private concern. Yesterday I spoke at my brother Herb’s funeral held at his church. I would describe this church as an enthusiastic version of Christianity. Another of my brother’s, my nephew and a church friend of Herb's also spoke. Our combined thoughts, orally expressed, comprised about 25 minutes of the service. The remaining 30 to 40 minutes was comprised of two songs, one a favorite of my brother, and what I can only say were two sermons by the pastor of the church. In my view these were sermons that used Herb’s passing as a stimulus to strongly and at length profess the pastor's beliefs. Only respect for the fact that it was Herb’s church kept me from leaving. Here’s why.
A funeral is attended by the deceased relatives, friends, and others connected to the deceased person’s life. I think it is safe to say that a variety of faiths are present among the attendees (in fact, as I view faith as a private matter, I would not normally even bring the topic up). Attending such a service places one in a captive setting. All who speak to captive audiences ought to do so with a maximum respect for those who may hold beliefs that are quite different from those of the enthusiastic or evangelical Christian -- because the audience is captive and it is poor manners to deliver messages that they did not come to hear, and that implicitly, sometimes explicitly deny the validity of those beliefs. I do not begrudge or belittle the beliefs of enthusiastic and evangelical Christians. However, if I have placed myself in a setting devoted to the memory of my brother, I do not expect the event to be hijacked for the purpose of expressing enthusiasm for a particular view of Christianity. My brother would not have wanted that either – at the end of his life he was an enthusiastic Christian, but he was not impolite, unmannered, and insensitive to others.